Raine and I are doing fairly well. Except that I suck at making ends meet, which Raine at this point doesn’t notice or even know. At least not yet, because he believes and is assured that I can give him his basic needs (and some wants). In his eyes, I guess he’s pretty happy with me as his mom. (Though I may be an ogre some times) still he’s always gladly (most times with extra excitement) receiving me at the doorstep everyday when I come home from work. If it’s any indication of Raine’s contentment of me as his mom: I still get a lot of tight hugs and I love yous. So I guess I’m doing my job real well. 

On many occasions I’ve stated that parenting is a job for two persons. I may be living an illusion right now that our life is perfectly normal; though I hate to admit it I know that our tandem (Raine and I) lacks the father factor. I may not see (or realize) it yet but I am sure that the lack of a father has some effect in Raine’s life that could manifest later.

Long ago when I found what Raine’s (biological) father was up to, I’ve realized that he is not the kind of father that I want my son to grow up with. I don’t accept crumbs anymore. I want the whole bread or no bread at all. Ayoko na ng kapirasong langit. Paminsan-minsang kamusta? Pa-minsan minsang paabot ng tulong? Ni hindi nga makadalaw ng personal sa anak ko? No way. I’ve long ago stopped living a life of compromises. I may be selfish sometimes but I only want the best for my son.

Meanwhile, Raine and I are doing just fine: Thank God I still have a job. At last we found a loyal nanny/housekeeper (with us for a year now!). And I have good supportive friends around me that helps everytime I holler for one (sometimes even before). So what else can I ask for? I’ve started blogging that would hopefully (in time) fill up the current gaps. I’ve gained friends in the cyberspace that’s been very supportive each time I rant here. I think I’ve got most things pretty much covered… Maybe soon I’ll post a wanted: perfect father-perfect husband ad. He he.