(Like in that song by Bette Midler in the movie Beaches)
That’s the story of, that’s the glory of…well…not love, but raising a kid. At least I think it is.
Just when you feel like you’re moving ahead, there is always something that moves backward.
Raine is mostly not wetting his bed any longer, at least in the last six weeks: first two weeks: me waking up and literally carrying Raine out of bed to pee; second two weeks progressed to me waking up and walking Raine out of bed to pee; the past week, progressed to Raine waking up by himself, waking me up instead and going out of bed on his own to pee.
Another thing, bottles of milk is down to 3 (8 oz. each) from sunrise to bedtime (this time last year, 7-9 bottles). He’s eating more rice now, which is really great, considering that Raine’s solid staple food was fried potatoes to anything bread/biscuits and anything noodles.
Raine can strap his own mojo sandals to his feet without assistance, picks his own clothes to wear and if he tries harder (which isn’t always the case) he can get into them too by himself.
What a feat I might say. BUT…(Here comes the big but):
He’s sucking (as in sucking!) his fingers (not a finger, mostly 2 at the same time sometimes 3!) when he is pensive and thinks that nobody’s looking. In his age of 4 who spends lots of time playing in the yard, I don’t want to imagine what kinds of diseasing-carrying microbes are in those little hands and I’m not watching him 24/7 to constantly “disinfect”.
Additionally, Raine for some reason forgot how to feed himself. He certainly was able to in the past couple of years. Getting him into his pajamas (and sweater, dahil malamig ngayon) before bedtime is a PAIN in the ass. Nakakainis. AND, without gulpe-de-gulat, it has turned impossible to get him to eat on the dining table.
Raine is having obedience problems these days (not without a discussion first). If disobedience is a genetic trait, he definitely didn’t get it from me.
While Raine remains to be the sweet, easy-to-please joyful child, it just pains me a lot that this child cannot remember (he’s got short-term memory loss for things I don’t allow him to do) that I have his best interest at heart.
I just don’t want him breaking his neck (and in the process maybe get crippled, knocks on wood), that’s why I am sooo against his rather cute attempt at breakdancing. (yes, as in breakdancing!) Also, I don’t want him getting hit by some crazy jeepney/ tricycle driver (who do not respect pedestrian rights, like most Philippine PUV drivers are) that’s why I utterly insist at holding his hand when walking and crossing the streets.
And so we “fight” a lot, over silly little things and yes I do get angry a lot: angry at Raine and the situation at hand. Mostly to myself, because 80% of the time, Raine wins - even if don’t always admit it.
After each argument, yes I do tell Raine that it was because I love him very much and I don’t want anything irreversibly bad happening to him, that’s why I was angry. Each time, he’d say he’s sorry and some not-going-to-do-it-again sort of stuff. I’d get a kiss and a big hug. I’d feel better. Then he’ll be off at something similar in less than an hour. (Maybe normal for a four year old, pero nakakapagod.) It is a cycle and I hate sounding like a broken record - which I do these days.
“Screaming” I am, inside and out while I try hard in doing my best at this parenting thing. Raine is definitely succeeding, in everything he knows how. Still, I’d be trying, trying to keep him from harm’s way, trying to do all so he doesn’t grow up to be an obnoxious kid that I so hate and that others will love to hate.
Indeed, I am trying not to die of a coronary (para akong aatakihin sa puso tuwing magta-tumbling ang anak ko!) before seeing the good fruit of all these.
When do parents ever win?
February 5th, 2007 at 4:50 pm
i don’t think they disobey consciously. i think they just can’t think things through yet, kung ano consequences ng mga ginagawa nila. it’s the same with jan kasi. papagalitan mo, maya maya he’s going to do exactly the same thing. parang di natuto.
i try (and often i’m not successful, hehe) to not take it personally. i just sometimes tell myself he’s just a child and will grow out of it. yun nga lang, totoo ka, you’re going to suffer little heart attacks along the way, haha!
February 6th, 2007 at 11:20 am
hayy un na nga lang ang consolation ko, hes’s a child and he’ll grow up.
February 7th, 2007 at 1:11 am
Hay Ate Glo,
Ganon yata talaga. It’s true parenting isn’t always a “Kodak moment.” I hear you on the arguing with a toddler. It will get better though, my daughter is 5 and she has gotten better to listen to mommy. About the finger sucking, just try to tell him that there are things he can’t see in the dirt that can make him really sick. With my daughter, I told her if she doesn’t stop sucking her thumb- blood will come out(of course this is after we got her a “body book” and understood what the blood does).
Don’t underestimate on how much explanation the kid can take. Followed by: “if you hurt yourself, you’ll go to the hospital and you will miss Christmas”
February 7th, 2007 at 11:58 am
hello tina,
thanks. i feel better na di ako nag-iisa sa ganitong hinaing. he he. linya ko rin yan: “pag nabali leeg mo, sa hospital ang bagsak mo” eh super takot sa doctor at iniksiyon si raine. sometimes it works, sometimes hindi rin. he he. siguro nga mga two years pa akong parang sirang plaka. when raine is older siguro ok-ok na, mas intindi na niya.
February 13th, 2007 at 11:58 pm
hi, glo, been there, and it’s not easy talaga. there are kids who want to insist what they want and there are those naman who are pliable. as in the case of my daughter and son. most of the time, the defiant one is my daughter (kung sino pa ang babae). but it will change. through your constant communication, and consistent shower of love, Raine will grow to be a fine man.
it is normal din yata sa mga ina ang mangilo kapag sobrang hyper ang anak. minsan pa nga, when they were little, i imagine horrible things that could happen. result is overprotective ako. pero lumilipas din naman at natututo din naman.