The Journey. It’s Mine. [Daragang Magayon’s Personal Blog]

Wow, I’ve been online for hours just reading stuff. I missed bloghopping.

If there is one thing that I didn’t get to buy Raine when he was a baby was a baby stroller. For practical reasons. First I couldn’t buy one. Second, it was more convenient then to just carry Raine in my chest, in one of those baby straps. Gosh, my baby stuff terminologies have gotten rusty! He he.

Anyways, I might have relayed the story at some point here that I shopped the old fashioned way with a couple of my friends when I was six months pregnant. Had I been too net savvy then and had the resources, I would have just shopped online for baby stuff. But then shipping to the Phils. would have been too costly.

Speaking of baby strollers and shopping online, a Maclaren stroller is something I would have considered. Light weight, portable, stretchable legs, with carry handle, foot-operated pedal breaks, with water-proof hood, washable seats are among the many characteristics I would have weighed in, should I care for a branded one.

Durability is one too…you know, something like your 2nd or 3rd kid can still use.

August 1, 2008, I extracted this from statcounter: country stats of this blog:

As if I’ve got that much readership. I know most of them anyway. Mostly friends (old and new). Some family.

Hey guys, where are your readers coming from?

Tag-agosto is like tag-hirap, crisis, amihan (not hanging amihan, term i got recently from my mother). Something like that.

Sino ba nagsabi? This too shall come to pass. Well anyway…there came a point I doubted my capabilities first and foremost as a mother. Then as an individual. I can’t explain more…it’s just that when I thought I got things covered early on - more specifically in my hope of becoming a good parent - suddenly it smacked me in the face that I do not. Just proves to show that there really are things beyond my control.

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The highlight of my week is bringing Raine to school and picking him up later. We bickered, exchanged bags (baon bag and school backpack, not golf bags!): meaning he doesn’t want to carry any of the bags, not even the baon bag.

I thought we looked funny with Raine walking a few steps ahead of me while my right arm is stretched forward so that the umbrella I was holding makes it over his head. I could have been the caddy, except that he is no Tiger Woods. Ha ha!

It was just way too hot in town today. But a good weather nonetheless.

Rice farmers have harvested and folks were drying palay on road sides.I would have taken some photos but with my cp buried deep in my left pocket…and I completely forgot.

I needed to get out, so I did. I needed to walk, so I did.  Feels great to get a clearer head.

At one point Raine asked me why I wasn’t stepping on the grains, so he wouldn’t too. I told him in gist: It’s just so labor-intensive Raine,  it took a lot before those made it to this road, before those become the rice you eat on the dinner table. He he.

This will be Raine’s 3rd year and hopefully the last year in pre-school. The first year was he didn’t even make it to the first semester. The next year (2007), he made it through the whole school year.

This year he is supposedly in prep — preparatory for the first grade.

In the last two years we have been recycling his katipunero outfit for the program. This time we might have to get a more formal Filipino traditional costume like the barong. Well what is pinoy traditional costume anyway? He he. It isn’t as if I’m looking for a tactical gear. I may have to opt for something that looks like a barong but a tone-down version, nothing too formal.

This time Raine would be singing part of the bicol song ’sarong banggi’ (or is that sarong bangui?!). My written bicol is just horrible.

The teacher said to memorize. Raine didn’t want to memorize the stanza because he doesn’t understand what that means. I translated. Now the thing was memorized. 9 days to go…i hope stage fright wouldn’t get the best of him.

Since the earthquake here in bicolandia on Friday night, we’ve been experiencing after-shocks.

It’s really weird. I’m still dizzy! It’s like every hour or so, there are tremors.

I didn’t sleep the whole night last night. I’ve gained my strength and I have been bouncing back over the weekend with my still existing online commitments. This morning at around 11 am, I was finally dozing off in front of my computer while sitting down, in the middle of a blog post. Ha ha!

Weird feeling too, I thought I was dreaming. So I told my mother I really gotta grab some sleep while I still can, so she watched over Raine. It’s Monday but a National Holiday here, so the school boys are home.

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You all know who you are. Not just the ones who commented in my recent bleak-sounding posts. I’m still here, just a little lost but is otherwise fine.

It’s just that there are times I don’t want to be strong anymore. You know, when life’s been throwing punches…it can get tiring just shielding yourself.

Recently I just wanna be passive, hybernate and not think about the stuff I needed to do. I guess it happens to anyone at one point in time.

Hey guys, am still standing. Hybernation over. Thanks a lot. Salamat. Salamatonon.

fine tune.

re-focus.

reduce to lowest terms.

one load at a time.

one day at a time.

I think I just had the strongest mid-life crisis of all time. When I was burning with fever the other weekend, I went into a frenzy of erasing all my social networking accounts — friendster, facebook, linkedin, etc.Yes, i did erase all those.

I don’t know, I guess I just wanted to make my world a little smaller so I don’t drown.

We’ll see what’s next. I still don’t know what. I don’t want to worry anymore because it’s bad already that I panic.

Slowly, I need to come out of this hole. At least I still have the people I love and who love me back.

life is still good though a little tough.

am not exactly love-less.

am not exactly job-less.

am not exactly alone.

Wow…so it is really Friday. Been a week already and I haven’t done some substantial ‘work’. First it was the flu that really bugged me down. Now it’s life in general.  Do you ever get that feeling that you wanna disappear and maybe never come back? Yes like run away somewhere in recluse and not see or talk to anybody. To not even think. Just be alone.

I don’t know, maybe I am just too depressed to pull myself through. It’s just all bad timing. Well I can’t die yet, I’m even too scared to kill myself right now.

Shocks, I should fix my table lamp, it’s getting awfully dark where am sitting and it’s the middle of the day! Sorry…I didn’t mean to worry anyone, I just want to be devoid of any emotion for a little while.

My whole household is. It started with one of the twins. Followed by me. Now the two of us are up and about so it’s time for the next ‘batch’. Raine and my mother has been ‘knocked out’ today too. The beds in this house are like hospital beds now!

Now no more sleeping for me. It’s my turn to be on watch and make sure the prescribed meds are taken on time. I was the patient, now I gotta take care of the little patient.

Well..I guess it’s the time of year. Nobody’s been sick here for awhile. The only other one not infected is the one who is always not home! He was like grinning from ear to ear last night because he isn’t sick and can use my PC all he wants. Well, good luck kung di sya mahawaan! He he he. Hmmm…am not really complaining, I’m laughing out loud actually. After all, it’s just the flu. Not mesothelioma.

Well, i took a hot bath already earlier. The antibiotics have kicked the bugs’ asses! Now I’m ready for the long night, I make sure Raine kick the bugs’ asses too!Err, not a long weekend hopefully.